Many parents tend to reward children for getting good grades with gifts or prizes. However, these types of attitudes can have a negative effect on the child. Here you will find the advantages and disadvantages of giving children a gift if they get good grades.
Rewarding children for getting good grades can have a negative effect on them. Many times, to ensure that children get good grades, parents resort to a reward system, but is it right to encourage children with rewards to get good grades?
It is very important that you praise, praise, applaud and congratulate your child when he gets good grades at school, but never buy it with gifts. The only responsibility your child has as a student is to study, so acknowledge their merits and support them in their failures , but avoid that the ultimate goal is a gift or a prize.
In addition, you have to keep in mind that, if your child brings good grades, it does not hurt to celebrate with his favorite food, prepare a cake to share it with family and eat it to your health or go to the cinema to see a movie that you like.
Reward children for getting good grades? Advantages and disadvantages
Remember that material things are not the only, nor the best, way to reward your child’s effort. Teach them to work, which in the long term will make them happier than getting everything they want without effort.
Advantages of rewarding children for getting good grades
- Strengthen the positive. Reward your child for a good effort or recognize him with an ice cream or an hour of video games will always be a positive thing. Try to further strengthen your positive incentives, although you don’t necessarily have to do it with prizes.
- Immediate results. The behavior can be conditioned quickly and efficiently, with both negative and positive reinforcements. From a very young age your child usually responds with actions to this type of methods. The essential thing is that this does not become the only way to direct their behavior or motivate it, because its effect will slowly diminish.
- Discipline. You have to know that rewarding or punishing behaviors is a good alternative to maintain discipline and good behavior. If you want to shape your child’s behavior, this may work perfectly, but what happens when there are no punishments or rewards?
Disadvantages of rewarding children for getting good grades
- Cancel the conviction. The discipline you achieve in your child is based solely on rewards or prohibitions, in this way children do not understand the true value of being disciplined, but do so only to respond to your conditions , to win a prize or not be punished, and not by conviction.
- Results by interest. This can happen with school grades, where your child puts the prizes to true learning . Perhaps he does not want to be a punishment or wants to have a new toy, and to do so he resorts to copying a practical work or an exam, memorizing without learning to pass and cheat.
- Little focus on the objectives. If your child acts for the positive or negative reward, lose sight of the true goal. They may focus more on the result of an exam than on what they are doing and learning.
Arguments for and against rewarding children for getting good grades
The arguments in favor of rewarding children for getting good grades are:
- If you give him a gift, your child will learn that effort and perseverance bear fruit. This is a detail for his good work and will help motivate him.
- In case you give something for your good grades, you have to assess whether it is convenient that they be material objects; Maybe you prefer a congratulation, a hug, a kiss or some attention. This will fill you with satisfaction. Your child will be very happy that you recognize his work and effort .
- There is nothing wrong with rewarding your child’s effort, but ideally, do not expect it , in this way you will understand it as the result of your work and not as something you should always receive. Thus, you will be aware of your own perseverance and dedication.
- You can also use the gift as an incentive when your child begins to lose his way, as long as it does not contribute to his indiscipline. Try to take it as a goal, as a motivation. It is best to carry out a daily reinforcement and without rewards that have a material value.
The arguments against rewarding children for getting good grades are:
- Your child has to understand that studying is his responsibility and that getting good grades is very important to have a good future. Don’t let him get used to always getting a reward for his achievements.
- Gifts can be counterproductive when your child thinks that more than having the obligation to study, it is you who should give him a gift at the end of the course. This will make them demand more and better gifts.
- The reward cannot be used as an end in itself. Your child can interpret that he has to study to receive something in return. You run the risk of perceiving it as something inherent at the end of each quarter or course . It will no longer be effective if you wait for the gift even when you get bad grades.
- If you promise a present for approving everything, it can also be detrimental in case you don’t get it, as it will increase your sense of failure.
- It is more effective if you dedicate time and affection. Keep in mind that the most valuable things you can leave for your child are values ??and a basis for their future adult life. The economic and the material are only momentary.
You have to be aware that your child may sometimes deserve a prize for getting good grades or a reprimand if the opposite happens. The important thing is that rewarding him is not the only alternative to motivate him to obtain good grades , since his own conviction to do things well for himself may be invalidated.